News of Jews

1.) A TMQ2 Wedding


Word-Drum is finally married. In a special sadomasochistic ceremony held in San Francisco, he wed comedienne Sarah Silverman. After screaming their vows at each other, they thanked the Rabbi and then slapped each other to end the ceremony.

All cried, especially LoB.

2.) Obama to Play a Jew

If Obama loses the election, he has been offered the role of Sammy Davis Jr. in an upcoming film by Spike Lee. They will use actual tracks of Davis singing and dancing so Obama just has to look the part. Like Madonna, at one point Barry had to decide (for Madonna, it was to be an actress or a “musician.”) be an actor or a politician. Now Barack can be as liberal as he likes, he’s going to Hollywood.

3.) Vegetable Oil to be Replaced in Ten Years

Obama promises to end our dependence on vegetable oil and replace it with a new cooking substance to be developed by the government. He will spend 100 billion on R&D. That makes projected taxes under Obama 98-per cent of income. Many will have to work three extra months each year to keep up with their tax bill. Michelle did warn us. She said we will have to change for Barack. But I won’t have to. Like millions of Americans who don’t pay taxes, I will continue to work as little as possible.

Sarah Silverman - Funny Girl at Large